20 Things That Prove I Actually Am An Adult.

I am 31 years old, and 10-year-old me would’ve thought I was an old fuddy-duddy. However, aging is such an odd thing. As you get older you, of course, mature and your body fat increases and your skin elasticity decreases, but it all happens so subtly that you never actually feel like an adult in your brain. There is no magic time or place where it’s like, “Ok, now you are an adult.” I suppose high school or college graduation could serve as those moments, but still…it doesn’t feel like it.

Recently I have caught myself doing things that act as a quick pinch to remind me I am actually not that young and hip anymore (if I ever was to begin with). Here goes it:

  1. I keep Urban Dictionary on speed dial (after learning in a business meeting that Netflix and chill does not actually mean Netflix and chill).
  2. I know what speed dial means.
  3. There are three humans who refer to me as “Mom”
  4. I have said, “When I was your age we had to wait through the commercials. Yes! All of them.”
  5. I have said, “Are you ready for bed?” to my spouse before 8pm.
  6. I have to buy my nieces and nephews things to get them to say I’m their cool aunt.
  7. I had to put a phone call with my best friend in my calendar…and book it a week in advance.
  8. I have made the switch to Kidz Bop (ever since my daughter bolted out, “I didn’t know that I was starving ’til I tasted you” in the grocery store checkout line.)
  9. I get giddy when the house is clean.
  10. I got a new toaster as a Christmas gift (and I wasn’t mad about it).
  11. I consider a couple driveway beers a wild Friday night.
  12. I voluntarily drive a mini-van.
  13. I have called the doctor about poop color. (for a child, to be clear)
  14. “I have a person for that.” My repertoire of home repairmen, lawn peeps, pest control, garage door fixers, etc… is impressive.
  15. #ThrowbackThursday is my favorite Spotify playlist.
  16. People laugh when I do “The Floss”
  17. I have said, “Yeah, well life’s not fair,” more often than I care to admit.
  18. I don’t even have to check in at the OB or pediatrician’s offices anymore.
  19. I actually think my dad’s jokes are funny.
  20. I love Brussels sprouts.

Alright, that’s enough adulting for one day. If you need me, I’ll just be here listening to Britney CDs and eating Pop Rocks.

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